Monday, December 18, 2006

Christmas Spirit

So Christmas spirit comes and goes for me. At my own house decorations are normally far and few between so I always relied on my parents house to be filled with the yearly Santa Clauses, Christmas lights and stockings. For the first time ever last year my mother announced we were to have a fake tree, I was not a happy girl. Given this alleviated the problem of the dog wanting to mark his territory in the house, the needles getting stuck in your house slippers and watering the thing in hopes it lasts until New Years but it changed my aspect on the 'normalcy' of what Christmas was.
This year she announced we weren't to have stockings. I pretended not to receive this text message. When I spoke with her later that evening she asked if I got it and I stated I had but was choosing to ignore it. A few days later she announced stockings would still be in place. Call me be a brat but after the fake tree incident I was putting my foot down for the stockings.
So anyway…I deal with an organization that has a mentor program for children with incarcerated parents. I attended a Christmas party last night with my mentee and her family. As you look around at all these children you find for those moments of candy cane reindeer, Christmas song charades and stars full of prayers the fact that a parent of theirs won't be spending Christmas with them is tucked back in their mind, or at least they pretend its nonexistent. My girl's grandma asked me if all these children have a parent in jail/prison. I said yes. She promptly looked at my mentee and stated "you always be thankful for your family" and my beautiful 15 yr old friend complete with a little attitude, hair dye, and heavy eye makeup stated "I am Grams, I am"

I immediately felt guilty. I am whole heartily thankful for my amazing family and friends but I often forget that the 'Christmas spirit' is more about that then fake trees, no stockings and whether someone remembers to make the chocolate pie. My eyes starting welling up with tears as I drove home thinking about the adorable little 3 yr old boy I wanted to take home. His rendition of rock around the Christmas tree will melt your heart. I wanted to know his story.

I came home and was promptly annoyed by the lack of items I had asked for earlier that day and with the response of "I forgot". As I grumbled off to Walgreen's myself, flashing thoughts of children dressed up as tissue paper Santa's, and paint filled ornaments overcame me. This humbled me completely all over again and I realized that perhaps some around me should experience what it is like to be an observer in situations like these. Where a bag full of Christmas gifts even though they could be a funky colored sweater make your day, where the choice between Italian or Ranch dressing is 'cool' and the fact that they still find some sort of happiness for the family photo being taken even while missing one.

I would have to say that kind of child like faith, strength and smile is one of the most beautiful things in the world and will change you if you have the opportunity to experience it.

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