Wednesday, November 8, 2006

For Good

An impact…

"The effect or impression of one thing on another"

You have to wonder the impact you have on those around you. The kid that stepped in front of your car, the woman searching the labels at the grocery store, the man on the street holding out his hand.

How many people do we truly make an impact on, and at the end of the day were they more positive or negative impacts?

I'm convinced we are all intertwined. Sort of that six degrees of separation bit. That for one reason or another someone graces their presence in our life. Whether it being the drive thru man that says "God Bless You" to the gum smacker that follows you around for commission.

It all makes an imprint. An imprint in the sand that can be easily washed away or a cement imprint that takes a shatter to break. I find that you often don't realize the impact you make on others and it's only until much later you realize that even those you never thought made an impact on you.

Lately I found a handful of people on my mind, my heart and I only hope that in some sort of way I have impacted, even if for a moment. In turn they have impacted me. It's not a secret to those around me that often I have a rather cynical jaded attitude of sorts, I'm completely ashamed of this attribute most times and I found yesterday it has softened. Through another's emotions/reactions I have found that I am healing.

They have no idea of this, they have no notion of what would ever need to be healed but through our conversation I began to feel warmth, sadness, an urge of compassion that I hadn't in a long time. It was absolutely wonderful.

I think we often forget what even the tiniest things could do for another. I try my best, and my best often isn't good enough. I try again though, always.

I probably will never understand why some come into my life or why I meander into someone else's. All I know is that it's the best off roading you can do. You just never know if that impact causes you to detour or it causes them to have the motivation to move forward.

Having the strength to allow them in is the hardest part….

My heart has softened. I've been waiting so long. Thank you.

"I've heard it saidThat people come into our lives for a reasonBringing something we must learnAnd we are ledTo those who help us most to growIf we let themAnd we help them in returnWell, I don't know if I believe that's trueBut I know I'm who I am todayBecause I knew you
I have been changed for good"

Monday, November 6, 2006

The Perfect Blossom is a Rare Thing

I've been pretty overwhelmed with life's little uncertainties lately. I can't help but worry, wonder or try to over analyze…everything.

My worrisome attitude ebbs and flows constantly. At this moment I'm at peace though. Calm and collected while it rushes around me. Life is so beautifully messy it's a wonder why I tried so hard to color in the lines when I was little.

I'm still unsure about pretty much everything in my path right now but I'm learning to alleviate some of the negative focus. Spending too much time worrying, contemplating instead of doing makes your life so nonliving.

I will always worry I am built this way but each day I am also being built to be content. Not to stand for less but to embrace what I have been given. Faith that friendships with those that are real truly are a rarity and should be held onto forever, hugs from certain people make you feel more safe that you ever thought, looking inside yourself for strength can change a situation completely and faith in life is what makes things so complicated yet so unbelievably worth it.

"The perfect blossom is a rare thing. You could spend your life looking for one, and it would not be a wasted life."

I am humbled, blessed and amazingly thankful of the world I have been given