Saturday, November 15, 2008

25 hours

By the time I was 26 I thought I would have a little more figured out then I have. I suppose sitting and thinking about it all however, I have figured out some things, just not what I was originally planning on.

I feel I am at a sort of crossroads, a sort of 'should I stay or should I go?' and either way it won't be the end of the world. Either way I have a family that supports me, a man that loves me and a best friend that is still to far away.

I feel like in terms of pay checks, authority, and independence I've dropped the ball somewhere. Somewhere I jumped off the train that was heading to "Lacey's Planned Out Future" and got off on the stops of "Not Without You" and "Unexpected Situations"

At first…I was okay with this, I mean life is about new adventures right? I guess when you start to feel kicked around, over looked and downright manipulated you kinda wish the decisions you made to help could be reversed.

I've hit plenty of rocks on the road I had always envisioned…

I've never been at a stand still…

Now here I am…standing…still… while going through the motions of someone that has to get 25 hours stuffed into 24. My concern is not that 25 hours do not fit in 24, my concern is they are no longer my 25 hours.

This is one of those times you search for something and realize you already know the answer but there are consquences.

**Faith...having to be restored

"We had no knowledge that our lives had just changed. You seldom sit at a
crossroads and know it's a crossroads." Alex Raffe