Monday, April 16, 2007

I'm glad I'm not God

I am a firm believer that people cross your path for a reason. Whether it's for your own benefit or theirs I have yet to determine. Could a hurt, with time turn into a benefit?

How often you don't realize the impact someone has had on your life until a chain of events changes the course of your interaction with each other. How one sentence can unravel an array of emotions setting in motion the future.

I'm glad I'm not God. I can only imagine how many times this happens, how many hearts hurt and how many prayers are whispered. How do you know which hearts to heal or which prayers should remain unanswered?

I suppose if you take the time to notice, often things are blessings in disguise but currently I do not feel this way. In THIS moment all I feel is numb. I figure the numbing is yet another learning experience.

One where you are happy for another but given their decisions you ache as well. I believe those are the moments that ones true self surfaces. One just hopes that your true self has the courage to smile, wish them luck and be strong enough not to cry until they walk away.

I lack the latter. I figure if I lack one of the three its better to lack the last one. Despite knowing that it's the best choice, my heart will still feel.

Because at the end of the day, all I want is for you to be happy.